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The Director Behind
ELECTION and SIDEWAYS
To Helm HBO Penis Pilot HUNG!!

Say what? by argonaught	May 9th, 2008 12:32:15 AM

Oh, by argonaught	May 9th, 2008 12:32:46 AM
and first bitches!
I guess nobody cares about this news, huh? by argonaught	May 9th, 2008 12:35:15 AM
I enjoyed Sideways but I don't know what to think about this news.
Alexander Payne is awesome! by justabox	May 9th, 2008 12:49:00 AM
I can't imagine how that premise could sustain cough an entire series though. What else is it about?
I care, argonaught, I care by Charlie Murphy	May 9th, 2008 12:49:18 AM
i like alexander payne, but i'm on the fence about the premise and the writers. i've seen the first season of the riches, and while i don't hate it, i don't love it... and what's HBO doing greenlighting a show like this anyhow? what's season 2 of HUNG going to be about? "That's right, class, I've STILL got it!" Season 3: The new biology teacher in town has a big secret... in his pants!" I'll catch the pilot, i do for every show, and we'll go from there i guess. good casting would definitely sweeten the pot, though.
Oh, this'll be BIG!!! by Paul T. Ryan	May 9th, 2008 01:13:21 AM
Yep, it'll be bloody HUGE!!!! Hopefully the writing won't be TURGID, but BULGING with wit and THROBBING with energy! And I'm sure given that it's on hbo, it'll run completely UNCUT!!! You'd be NUTS to miss it! One hopes the network suits won't pull a BONER by treating the way they did with DEADWOOD. That'd be just half-COCKed! I love that hbo have the BALLS to TACKLE such edgy material. I'm sure it'll have a LONG run, as long as the writers aren't total DICKS. You'd be an utter KNOB not to tune in!!!!
This Is Just So Wrong by Rebeck2	May 9th, 2008 01:13:25 AM
I think I'll wait for the female spin-off... "Tight".
They based that show on me by Riley Martin	May 9th, 2008 01:19:24 AM
cause I have a huge fucking schlong. It's so big, I dickslapped Zooey Deschanel and knocked her out cold.
Now, I've seen it all. by The Guy Who Slept Through Everything.	May 9th, 2008 02:15:41 AM
But I'm still not surprised by this.
I like Payne a lot, but this sounds...um...lacking? by leobloom	May 9th, 2008 02:36:47 AM
I mean the guy's endowed and all, but...um...this sounds lame.
Hard show to pull off! by Sledge Hammer	May 9th, 2008 03:18:31 AM
Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week. Try the monkey balls.
All Out of Remakes by Playhouse	May 9th, 2008 04:34:28 AM
So let's go to dick jokes. Sad state of affairs for creativity nowadays.
HBO = by palewook	May 9th, 2008 06:09:18 AM
wHo gives a shit channel.
Hmm... by Cobbio	May 9th, 2008 06:53:41 AM
I enjoyed "Sideways," but I need to know more about this HBO project before I'm onboard. In all honesty, it sounds... creepy. But with Payne at the helm, I hope it goes someplace interesting.
Hopefully by Series7	May 9th, 2008 07:19:41 AM
It turns out better then Sideways. That movie was painfully too yuppie. About Shit and Election were amazing movies though. I am still amazed that Jack Nicholson didn't win that Oscar. Crazy race that year for best male actors. A bunch of the greats getting beaten out by some newbies. Granted Cooper has been amazing but Brody is shit (though against the odds I liked him in Kong, but that was probably cause of Jackson) and the Penist was a crap movie that everyone ate up because its WWII jew movie, whatever people ate it up.
I'll ask the same question again (PREACHER) by Geophyrd	May 9th, 2008 07:24:50 AM
Long as HBO is creating more series no one cares about (Unscripted, The Comeback, Fat Actress) why isn't anyone else on here clamoring for Preacher?
Er. sorry by Geophyrd	May 9th, 2008 07:25:24 AM
Fat Actress was a Showtime show. Sorry about that, chief.
Six Feet Under... by sirbroiler	May 9th, 2008 07:36:48 AM
...his belly button. That's what they should have called it.
HBO should turn Empire Falls into a series! by DrunkenBusboy	May 9th, 2008 07:44:34 AM
That movie was great and would make a funny series!
This could be semi-good... by Fico	May 9th, 2008 07:56:50 AM
just sayin
Whoa- is this for real? by Regenhund	May 9th, 2008 08:08:21 AM
Seriously, a big-dicked high school coach? This sounds like the worst idea for a tv show outide of a gay porn channel, I've ever heard. This has the potential to make the Sopranos seem like wholesome family fare by comparison.
I want to see 12 Miles of Bad Road, HBO! by Lance Rocke	May 9th, 2008 08:11:28 AM
Why did it get killed?
Seriously? by fiester	May 9th, 2008 08:11:50 AM
That's the premise?
Cripes, HBO is just sad these days. by fiester	May 9th, 2008 08:15:11 AM
Seriously. Fire the entire creative team, execs and all. Start fresh. It can't possibly be any worse than the last few years of crap. The only good show they've put out in years in "Flight of The Conchords" and that's all The Conchords. RIP HBO, indeed.
you seriously by ZO	May 9th, 2008 08:20:55 AM
do not want to see 12 miles of bad road. maybe the worst show ever made
HBO giving viewers the shaft by Fico	May 9th, 2008 08:42:09 AM

i'm torn by Toe Jam	May 9th, 2008 09:48:57 AM
i love alexander payne's work, but i really don't think i can comfortably sit with my girlfriend and watch a show whose main plot point is a character's huge cock. it was fine for "boogie nights," but the thought of watching an hour of that gag (no pun intended) every week makes my non-supersized dick shrink like a frightened turtle.
I agree Geophyrd by Macstone	May 9th, 2008 09:53:46 AM
I've been waiting and waiting over the past year for the announcement and have even written HBO several times about Preacher. After the Wire ended I cancelled my subscription, because it really was their last good show. Showtime has kind of taken over as the pay channel with the best original series. Dexter and Brotherhood alone make it worth the price. Who knows maybe they'll even be smart enough to beat HBO to the punch and pick up Preacher.
I can't believe no one has made an ERECTION joke yet... by Random Coolzip	May 9th, 2008 10:19:54 AM
...you guys are falling down on the job!!! ;)
Fuck HBO by Dr Gregory House	May 9th, 2008 10:31:48 AM
If the series is good and it develops a loyal following, they will just pull the plug on it, ala Deadwood and Carnivale.
A Song of Ice and Fire... by Gatsbys West Egg Omlet	May 9th, 2008 10:34:41 AM
is supposed to get made by HBO, right? why don't they do that already? there will never be a better time for it, with comic dorks ruling the world and fantasy fanboys frothing. try saying "fantasy fanboys frothing" five times fast.
I can believe it by Macstone	May 9th, 2008 10:40:39 AM
Here's why: HBO used to be the home of the greatest shows you could watch on television. OZ, Sopranos, Deadwood, the Wire, Six Feet Under etc. But the last couple of years they've made some bad decisions. ie: John From Cincinnati (great show, but cancelled), Lucky Louie (funniest show I've seen in quite a while, but cancelled), Deadwood ends abruptly even though it's a great show, Carnival is cancelled in what was obviously not supposed to be the end of the story. . . I can go on and on. They need to just pull it back together. HBO just doesn't seem to care about making Sunday nights worth looking forward to anymore. For those of you unfamiliar with Preacher, I'll just say that it would have been a great cornerstone for HBO, but I'm assuming that they already dropped the ball. Anyway back to my original point: I can believe that no one made the erection joke because I for one didn't read the article. I doubt that anyone is interested in reading about a penis show on a has been pay channel that doesn't have good shows anymore.
Song of Ice and Fire by frongbak	May 9th, 2008 11:00:40 AM
Yes...make...now...I love Payne but he did co-write I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry, hopefully he hasn't fully sold out...and Sideways was awesome...ditto Election About Schmidt and Citizen Ruth
Preacher by Geophyrd	May 9th, 2008 11:07:43 AM
I know Mark Steven Johnson (who may or may not be the right guy for Preacher...Daredevil was much better in the directors cut, Ghost Rider was just ass and Elektra was actually much better than it seemed on first viewing) is in Rome making a movie with Kristen Bell called When In Rome. Having said that, Garth Ennis is on the series as executive producer (as well as currently writing Constantine 2) so how bad could it be? Other rumors were that Robert Rodriquez wanted to direct either the pilot or a few of the series episodes. Last, not least, Grant Morrison's series The Invisibles would be a great acquisition for HBO or Showtime. Morrison said The Matrix (the first movie) was a direct rip off his Invisibles series. Everything we loved about the first Matrix movie came from there, never mind the sequels. Let's go back to the source and make me an Invisibles series that would keep me glued to my TV set.
Song of Ice and Fire by WerePlatypus	May 9th, 2008 11:11:51 AM
would be a great HBO series - drama, sex, war, and all around grim kick-assery. . But instead we get a fat cock. Nice.
Sounds like a show from Idiocracy or GTA4 by wash	May 9th, 2008 11:16:31 AM
Can't wait for ASS: THE MOVIE or America's Top Hooker.
This could actually turn out good. by BackRiverCatfish	May 9th, 2008 11:29:42 AM
If anyone bothered reading the Variety article, it makes the show sound better than Herc describes it, shocker! I have a feeling the main character is going to become a porn star or gigilo to the soccer moms, I have a feeling there looking for a show kind of like Weeds or Breaking Bad, either way we should get lots of nude chicks. HBO still looks very shitty for the forseeable future though, hopefully Entourage comes back strong. And for the guy who thought that Sideways was too yuppie-ish, the whole point of the movie was to show how stupid yuppies and wine snobs are.
What's he coach...pole vaulting? BaDumDum by Cletus Van Damme	May 9th, 2008 11:56:15 AM
Thanks, I'll be here all week.
BackRiverCatfish by Series7	May 9th, 2008 11:58:51 AM
Just as long as it's filled with that typical Alexander Payne type of nudity, then i'll be there!!!
And yet they canceled Carnivale.. by F-1000	May 9th, 2008 11:59:18 AM
The best serial drama ever, with one of the most epic and detailed mythologies ever conceived, "because it was too expensive." So that years later they could fashion a show around the premise of a cock. Even straight porn doesn't do that. Well, I guess penile prosthetics are cheaper than deeply immersive character driven period drama. So fail on, HBO.
Captboulder by F-1000	May 9th, 2008 12:00:39 PM
You're completely right. You know which other industry builds their narrative around TEH CACK? Gay porn.
The mind boggles... by Alonzo Mosely	May 9th, 2008 12:08:41 PM
I mean will it be alluded to but never seen, will it be alluded to and shown briefly as a prostehtic or will they actually try and find a lead actor with a huge cock. And how do you do that, send out casting sheets with "Early 30s, handsome, experience in drama and comedy as must, oh and by the way must have at least a 9" cock, preferably really thick and juicy, must have nice vein profile and be circumcised. And I mean do agents know if their client is packing, cause if that is standard knowledge that is kinda creepy. Or will they hire a lead actor and a stunt cock? Seriously, inquiring minds want to know... Well actually they would have preferred a series called 'Huge Rack' about a high school teacher with 38DDs, but of course in 2008 that would be demeaning and sexist, unlike a show about a guy whose main attribute is his cock size...
Goddam Hollywood turd burglars... by 2for2true	May 9th, 2008 12:19:17 PM
Would have loved to have been in the room when this douchefest was pitched... "See, it's all about a high school coach...WITH A MASSIVE, OH GOD, STOP ME FROM GOOIN'MYSELF, HUGE, FREAKIN' SCHLONG, AND, AND, AND well, thassit. Whaddya think?" Hey 'BO - We don't want any more shitty sex shows. Give us quality drama, like Carnivale, 6 feet Under, Deadwood, and Sopranos. Put down the blow, get your collective gayheads outta the closet and quit fuckin' off. That is all.
Now look what you've done HBO by Fred	May 9th, 2008 12:29:57 PM
You just went and made the Painless Pole angry.
The writers could have pitched it as by skimn	May 9th, 2008 12:35:21 PM
"You see, the guy with the huge schlong is a metaphor for Jesus Christ. He will have his followers, and those who will want to bring him down..." HBO executives nodding, as though in deep thought..."Yes....I see...."
Hey! I never authorized a biopic! by GrantChastain	May 9th, 2008 12:37:18 PM
I think Grant Chastain gonna sue somebody.
HBO gives us this but cancels Rome??? by Nico Toscani	May 9th, 2008 12:48:27 PM
Is there an intentional move away from high quality and towards "edgy"? A show about a guy with a big cock? Give me a fucking break!
I can see it now..... by Oriba	May 9th, 2008 12:59:29 PM
Because he's a high school coach, there will be some kind of reference to "To Catch a Predator"
Bring Back Sunday by Macstone	May 9th, 2008 01:03:13 PM
Preacher will save Sundays for you HBO. Showtime, scoop it if you can.
Its the by skimn	May 9th, 2008 01:05:40 PM
"Milton Berle Story", or the "Andy Dick Saga"...
Where's the punchline? by WickedJester	May 9th, 2008 01:12:11 PM
This sounds like the start to a joke... So this gym teacher has a huge penis...
No, they canceled Carnivale BECAUSE IT SUCKED by gruntybear	May 9th, 2008 01:41:23 PM
It went nowhere. It said nothing. And it was deathly dull. Can we please - FOR FUCK'S SAKE - quit it with the whining about its cancellation some three years now after its demise? It ain't coming back. So, seriously, just move on.
I pledge allegiance by Christopher3	May 9th, 2008 01:43:56 PM
to AMC and Showtime, and the awesome shows for which they stand.
your heard it here first... by doodah	May 9th, 2008 01:54:43 PM
steve gutenberg will "head" up the lead role in this project...he's got an an exhaust pipe in his jeans.
They must have left something out by Mazzle	May 9th, 2008 02:15:34 PM
My guess is that he uses his asset to be a suburban gigolo to soccer moms. That could end up being interesting, ala Breaking Bad. If they develop the client characters well, it could also have a tad of what makes Big Love a decent show. I must say HBO's marketers couldn't have found a stupider way to describe this. Without more information, big dick plus gym class teacher is going to equal pedophile to most people.
Maybe he can beat down a player with his enormous schlong by hst666	May 9th, 2008 02:35:19 PM
The kid is hospitalized with internal injuries due to the dick whipping? Seriously, sounds like a flimsy premise for anything other than a porno (straight or gay).
Was that why Gutes lost on by skimn	May 9th, 2008 02:40:21 PM
Dancing With The Stars? He kept tripping over his third leg?
GruntyBear about Carnivale by JBouganim1	May 9th, 2008 02:53:03 PM
Yes, I can see how someone would think season 1 sucked because it was slow and really nothing much happened. But I guarantee you if you actually stuck through it to the end of season 2, you would have been blown away
"Hey coach, is that a tetherball in your pants or are you just h by RueDBaga	May 9th, 2008 03:01:26 PM

JBouganim1 by Macstone	May 9th, 2008 03:07:59 PM
I agree with you; however, after having read his post, it's obvious to me that even if he had watched season 2 that it would have been a bit too complicated of a story for his level of intelligence.
Welcome Home Brother Charles by wash	May 9th, 2008 03:43:59 PM
a.k.a. Soul Vengeance - anyone see this? It was about a brother who kills people with his massive dick. Sadly it doesn't deliver on it's awesome premise (it's pretty slow) but the music is stony and weird.
gruntybear by IForgotAbout19	May 9th, 2008 03:47:17 PM
You are wrong.
Oh, my god by shaneo6930	May 9th, 2008 04:00:59 PM
Just when I thought HBO hit rock bottom.
At least they're bringing Bod & David back... by TurdFerguson44	May 9th, 2008 04:05:23 PM
Even though they seem pretty washed up lately....
Soul Vengeance??? by skimn	May 9th, 2008 04:08:58 PM
Does he urinate acid??? Ejaculate projectile bullet-speed semen??? Or just fuck everything in sight, and rip it apart?? How do you kill people with a massive dick, outside of bludgeoning?
Lol by skimn	May 9th, 2008 04:41:17 PM
Did a IMDB search of Soul Vengeance which does indeed involve a released convict with a lethal penis. And what did IMDB suggest 1st for "if you liked that" viewing? You guessed it....Shaft.
From HBO, the network that brought us The Sopranos, Rome, Carniv by c4andmore	May 9th, 2008 04:42:28 PM
oh how the mighty have fallen. No thanks, I'll pass
I was not a fan of Carnivale, but... by fiester	May 9th, 2008 04:48:16 PM
compared to HBOs efforts of late, Carnivale is the fucking Godfather. I mean, it's just sad, so so fucking sad.
Series 7 by BackRiverCatfish	May 9th, 2008 05:17:20 PM
Not a big fan of Kathy Bates' tits?
HBO: Quality Television... by nalapou	May 9th, 2008 05:22:02 PM
If "racy" and "shock value" means "quality". So over this network. Besides Curb it's WELL past its prime.
Am I the only one here who's seen "Big Love"? by bswise	May 9th, 2008 06:03:48 PM
No one ever talks about it here, but it is just excellent. C'mon, this is easily the best cast show on TV right now: Harry Dean Stanton, Bruce Dern, Chloë Sevigny, Grace Zabriskie... Hell-Ooohhhh!?! Best thing Bill Paxton's ever done, too. Like Weeds and The Sopranos, Big Love is also about outlaws trying to live the American Dream in all of its glory. Themes of marriage and money are dominant in all three series, and while Big Love is not as loopy as Weeds or as grizzly as Sopranos, it is more coherent and consistantly hits high marks for both humor and drama. Check it out, people!
Big Love is all right. But very forgettable. by fiester	May 9th, 2008 06:18:55 PM
Witness that you have to point out it even exists. It's a quieter show than even Six Feet Under was (though not as quiet as The Wire, a.k.a. the best show ever no one actually watched). I'll look at it if it's on but it's nothing to get excited about, nothing groundbreaking going on there, nothing people even talk about. It's just sort of there. I just don't understand where and how HBO went so fucking wrong creatively and it really pisses me off because it was once the role model for successful, independent, cutting edge serial programming. Now its idea of a show is a dick joke. < br/>< br /> Why? Why? Why? Are they just cheap? Is that it? This show sounds cheap to make. The last few shows they've tried have been cheap looking. Not a lot of special effects or big production values in a shrink's office. I heard part of the reason Rome was not back was because they did not want to pay for it--so are financial concerns playing a role in their decision making now? I don't know.
Can't watch big love becausse by lex romero	May 9th, 2008 08:33:36 PM
I can't buy into the concept that 3 attractve and intelligent women would be 'ok' with being married to teh same guy. I'm not saying it doesn't happen irl, but certainly not with the characters the show provides us with.
SLEDGE HAMMER by the9points	May 9th, 2008 08:33:56 PM
Way back up top. "Hard show to pull off!" Instant classic. Know that I’ll probably remember that for the rest of my life. As for HUNG. I'm sure it'll wind up being a fascinating character study etc - the guy has the credentials for such a take - that will receive unhealthy amounts of praise. The life of someone who views himself very differently to everyone else and tries to make sense it all day after day - but why about a dick? Why not a guy who had his hand lopped off? Cos it's always about the dick with those guys.
From The Wire to a show about a large penis by ebonic_plague	May 9th, 2008 08:39:12 PM
Man, HBO turbo boosted that shark. I wonder if this "new direction" is a result of HBO losing Carolyn Strauss in a management shake-up, who was some president or another and who was specifically responsible for nurturing some of the network's best shows during it's Sunday night heyday.
showtime has truly supplanted hbo by bacci40	May 9th, 2008 10:01:29 PM
i dont like the tudors, but many others do...but with shows like weeds, this american life (brilliant doc series), dexter, and that hot lesbo show...it seems showtime is the place to be...its still beyond me that hbo turned down mad men...what dumb fucks
If this lasts more than 4 hours... by Pouchstalker	May 9th, 2008 11:10:51 PM
Call your doctor you mat be severely mental.
So it's a show about a guy with a huge rooster? by Pouchstalker	May 9th, 2008 11:12:43 PM
Please tip your servers generously.
Son comes home from school...... by slayers bitch	May 10th, 2008 01:59:25 AM
Son comes home from school and says "Dad, the swim teacher told us to jump off the high board today and I was really scared and I couldn't jump." Dad says "Son did you do it?" Son says "then the teacher said, "Boy if you don't jump, I'm gonna stick my twelve inch cock up your ass!" Dad- "Well, son did you jump?" Son- "A little bit.... at first."
In the first episode... by otm shank	May 10th, 2008 02:35:43 AM
The gym teacher has a crush on one of the english teachers. Problem is he gets an erection every time he sees her. Not wanting to be embarassed on their first date, he ties his penis around his right leg. He goes to her front door to pick her up. She answers it. He kicks her square in the face. Hilarity ensues!
You know, it's sad really... by Sledge Hammer	May 10th, 2008 03:08:56 AM
On a network that used to give us shows like Oz, The Wire, Deadwood, Six Feet Under, The Sopranos, Rome, Carnivale, Band Of Brothers, From The Earth To The Moon, The Larry Sanders Show, Tales From The Crypt, Extras, The Corner, and even John From Cincinnati, all we've really got left from that era of HBO quality is now is Entourage, Curb Your Enthusiasm and Big Love, and, while all quite entertaining, none of those are exactly remarkable tv in the old HBO way. And for every rare treat on HBO these days, like John Adams, or, with a bit of luck, the upcoming Generation Kill and next year's The Pacific, we get crap like this, or In Treatment, or Tell Me You Love Me, or yet another crappy HBO reality show. Showtime really is the new king of cable these days.
It HAS to star Steve Guttenberg by BigTuna	May 10th, 2008 08:09:52 AM
He has a 10-inch cock! When he sits on the toilet, it touches the water!
I get this.... by seniorspeilbergio	May 10th, 2008 11:10:24 AM
I moved to LA 2 and a half years ago and after dating a few women here, I'm convinced that the number of small penises in Hollywood is well above the natural average. That's why this town is full of overachieving womanizers. They're all trying to prove to themselves deperately that size doesn't matter. It's a town full of small dicks trying to compensate with BMW's and arrogant attitudes. This whole town has penis envy, I swear. It's funny as shit!
Would it be racist if the guy was played by a black actor? by punto	May 10th, 2008 12:48:07 PM
I know my subject will get cut, so: Would it be racist if the guy was played by a black actor?
Erection, About Schlong... by nnnuts	May 10th, 2008 01:07:35 PM
Sideways.
loved sideways by Broseph	May 10th, 2008 08:34:07 PM
but this sounds stupid
2for2true! by just pillow talk	May 12th, 2008 01:07:22 PM
Did you stab the Hollywood turd burglars in the mouth with your #2 pencil?

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The Director Behind
ELECTION and SIDEWAYS
To Helm HBO Penis Pilot HUNG!!

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The Director Behind ELECTION and SIDEWAYS To Helm HBO Penis Pilot HUNG!!

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The Director Behind
ELECTION and SIDEWAYS
To Helm HBO Penis Pilot HUNG!!